Last night, I went out with a friend from high school. At the bar, she met up with a bunch of people who she knew (it was a birthday get-together), so I decided to talk to a cute guy who was standing by the karaoke book. It turns out he was on his annual beer tour, from Calgary, Canada. He was only in town for the night with a male friend who was wasted, and headed to Idaho the next day. He was tall (at least 6'3") and handsome, with nice blue eyes and a gorgeous smile. I started flirting with him, and he started buying me drinks.
We kept talking, and I kept flirting. My friend eventually left for another bar with her group, and I promised to meet up with her soon. So Canada guy and I kept talking, while his friend drunkenly sang some country karaoke. He eventually asked me "What do you want to do?"
Me: "Okay. I want to kiss you, and then I'd like to go home and go to sleep."
He then made 'the awkward face'...and held up his left hand, which had the same ring that his right hand had. I looked at it for a second and then it clicked.
Me: "Oh. Um. You're married?"
He nodded, somewhat ruefully. "I am. But you are so gorgeous, and if I was single, you better believe that we wouldn't be here right now."
Me: "Oh. That's...flattering. Thank you."
"No, really. Look at you!"
Me: "Thank you."
He then told me to smack him, which I refused. I don't hit people.
I felt terrible. I was hitting on a married man, even if I hadn't known. I try to be a good person. What was going on?
He and his friend decided to join me in going to the other bar, so we started walking there. He made me guess his age....I guessed 28, he was 36.
And had been married before. That was the ring on his right hand.
Married twice and 36 and now flirting with me? Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
And now that it was all out in the open, he acted astounded that I don't have a boyfriend, and kept flirting with me-giving me his coat, randomly hugging me.
I felt like shit. I left them at the bar getting more beer, and found my friend. She was dancing with a cute guy, so I left her alone and went to the bathroom, hoping it would be empty. Nope. 6 people in line, including a 41 year-old mother and her 23 year-old daughter. The mother was super drunk, and said "Can you believe I pushed this girl out of my vagina?"
I decided it was time to call it a night. I found my friend, and told her I was going to head home.
I went to bed with this knot in my stomach that hasn't gone away. What am I doing, flirting with a married man? Shouldn't I have asked about his rings? Granted, I did absolutely nothing other than hug him, but I still feel terrible.