Tuesday, June 15, 2010

A Date with Jesus

Last year, I went out on a date with a grad student. He was from Spain, and named Jesus. I don't normally use names, but his is important to the story. I met him in my university's cafeteria, as I was sitting with friends. I saw him sitting alone, eating dinner. I went to get dessert, and asked if he wanted company. His eyes lit up, and he smiled this big, beautiful smile. "Of course! I never turn down an offer from a pretty woman."

We sit and talk, and I help him with some English words. My friends left shortly after I sat down with Jesus, and sent me congratulatory 'he's so hot!' texts. We finished eating, and he gave me his email address, and asked me to email him. Of course, I did.

Jesus replied, and ended with "Have a nice day dear journalist". I had a huge smile on my face. Later that week, I invited him to watch a play with me. He agreed, because he hadn't seen any US theatre yet. I met him in his dorm the next week. I sent a text to a friend because he was late, saying 'I'm standing in the lobby, waiting for my fake date and feeling like a loser because Jesus is late.' She replied 'Jesus is never late, he is time itself...I'm sure he will be there *hugs*'.

Right after I got that frankly brilliant text, here comes Jesus! He apologizes for being late, and does the delightful European kiss on both cheeks thing. We walk to the theatre, and watch To Kill a Mockingbird. He thinks the Southern accents are hilarious, and hard to understand. I agree wholeheartedly. The play ends, and he hugs me, thanking me for a wonderful time.

He walks me back to my dorm, and asks "Could we see another show sometime?"
"Well, I have a brochure in my room of all the different shows. Do you want it?"
"Sure! Is it okay if I come with you?"
"Of course."

We walk up to my room, and he asks about some of the things in my room, like photos, and my 'Don't Panic' towel and my giant teddy bear.

I give him the brochure. He thanks me, and says "Is there anything I can do for you?"
I say "Besa me?" (It means 'kiss me' in Spanish.)
"Yeah, yeah! Besa me! Good pronunciation!"
"Um, besa me?"

He gets it, and his face falls.
"Oh."
He then spends 20 minutes explaining that he likes me, but not in that way, and he doesn't want to lead me on by kissing me. And he doesn't have a girlfriend, but if he did, he'd love it if I was his girlfriend. And he had such a good time tonight, and it would be better if we were just friends. And he's really sorry, and you are really beautiful, but I just can't date anyone right now. "I'm so sorry."

We have a nice hug good night, and he leaves.

Of course, the next week, I meet his girlfriend inadvertently. I was outside on the Oval, watching someone on a slackline. We start talking, and she says she's waiting for a boyfriend. Of course she has a boyfriend, she's gorgeous and nice.

We keep talking, and then her face lights up. "There he is!" I turn, and there's Jesus, running from the gym. They kiss hello, and he's completely befuddled. "You know each other?" She says "We just met....OH! You're Anna? He's told me so much about you! You took him to the play! That was so nice of you!"
I say "Oh, it was no problem. I had a good time."
Jesus asks his girlfriend for help with an essay, and I tell them "Oh, I'm just going to keep walking. Have a good night!"

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