Thursday, April 29, 2010

A Poor Decision, A Saga (Part 2)

I try and forget about him over Thanksgiving; I convince myself that it was a one-night thing. And besides, he seemed a bit crazy! But he's such a good kisser, my betraying mind keeps telling me. And he took you out to breakfast! After sex! That only happens on 'Sex and the City'! my mind taunts me.

I call him around 5, on the Monday I get back, because I couldn't stop thinking about him. He calls me around 11 and tells me that he wants to see me again.  


He tells me that he’s smoking pot and drinking with friends, and that he’ll call me in an hour.  


I get a call from him at 11:11.

Make a wish! 

“I’m outside at the bus stop.” He kisses me hello, and puts his arm around me as we walk inside and upstairs to my room.

He smiles at me, and says "Look what I have!" as he pulls a bottle of whiskey out of his backpack. I hardly ever drink, so I decline. He says he wants to show me something on youtube, and starts showing me music videos. We keep kissing, and I tell him “I’m so glad you called me.”
He laughs a little and smiles as he says  “Who else would I call?”
I jokingly say, “Well, you’re so handsome that there must be other girls.”
He kisses me again and says “Nope. You’re the only one.”


Sex happens. It's college. But then, it hurts hurts hurts like a motherfucker. Ow ow fuckity ow! Something went wrong down there, and I curl up into the fetal position. He rubs my back and assures me that it’s okay. We talk a little more, it’s 2am.

He then tells me:
“I’m going back to Boston in two weeks.”
“I know, I’m going back to Helena in three for Christmas break.”
My curiosity kicks in. “Did you sleep with anyone in Idaho?”
“Are you planning on sleeping with people in Boston?”
Alright, okay, I can deal with that. I say “Okay. Do you just want to see where we’re at in January?”

Then, then, then, he says very casually:
“I’m sleeping with a lot of other people on campus.”

WAIT JUST A GODDAMN SECOND. Whatever happened to: "Nope, you're the only one?" Boooo. What is this?

As it's 2am, I'm trying to process this information. “Oh. Um. Okay. Are you going to sleep with your ex-girlfriend in Boston?”
“Okay. Are you going to get back together with her?”
“I’m going to marry her.”


“Oh. Um. Are you going to marry her over Christmas break?”
“No, in about three years.”

WHAT? What is this? He's going to marry his ex-girlfriend? Does she even know about this plan?

“Oh, so when you’re done with school.”
I'm stunned. “Um. I’m glad you’re planning ahead for the future?”

He gets up. I’m sleepy and confused and hurt.
“Where are you going?”
He tells me “I’m getting really angry right now, and I have to leave.”


 I ask him “Is there anything I can do to help dissipate your anger?”

Yeah, that's right. Dissipate. I went there.

“No. I’m going to lose control soon, and I need to get out of here. I don’t want to be here.” He starts shaking his head and getting dressed.
“Um, did I do something wrong?”
“No. I just need to get back to my room.”
I’m trying to be all cute as I say “Well, you’re not going to leave me naked in bed all alone, are you?”
He pauses as he’s putting his brown corduroy pants on. “You can put your clothes on.”

Ouch, motherfucker. Ouch.

I put some clothes on, and ask if he wants me to walk him downstairs.

I ask if I’m going to see him again. I don't know what's come over me, he's obviously batshit insane. I guess I am as well.

 He says “Tomorrow is a stranger; we don’t know what it will bring.”

How poetic.

I could’ve done with a yes or no.
He gets this look on his face and gives me a long kiss and incredible hug and tells me “It’s not your fault.”

You're damn right it's not my fault.

He then turns, opens the door, and walks out.

I am confused. I start crying.

Part 3 of the saga will be posted tomorrow.

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